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Wellington: Too posh, too cultured, too healthy for sausage rolls
Oct 22, 2020
OPINION: SoWellingtonians​ have to drive 350 kilometres to New Plymouth to buy one of the nation's Top 10 sausage rolls – but even that’s too close for our refined tastes.
Goldstar Bakery Patrick’s Pies​ of Tauranga has won New Zealand's inaugural Legendary Sausage Roll competition and the Top 10 list even has isolated places such as Takaka on it.
But the fact not one Capital City bakery could turn out a Top-10-quality sausage roll is not something for we Capitalians to be ashamed of.
Put simply, it is evidence that Charles Darwin was right – evolution is a thing. Bakers know their market, Wellingtonians know their food.
We are too posh for sausage rolls. Too cultured. Too healthy. We live in a modern city, far, far away from Ladies, A Plate Land. And we like it that way.
A sausage roll is all very well if you like tomato sauce, grease, cholesterol and slimy fingers – all things popular in the 1950s.
From a Wellington point of view (let’s say the top of stunning Mt Victoria) the sausage roll is not well suited to the environment and to those who call the city home.
Why? You may well ask. I am glad you did. I have ALL the answers.
First, the wind. In spring, pollen is blown here, there and everywhere by incessant gales. Why would anyone choose to add pastry flakes to that green and yellow mix?
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