Signs Your Partner Was Emotionally Abused By Their Ex
Oct. 10, 2019
Your partner may have completely moved on from their ex. But unfortunately, baggage from past relationships can have a way of staying with you for an undetermined amount of time.
If your partner was emotionally abused by they ex, chances are, it will affect your relationship now.
They're Not Completely Comfortable Expressing Themselves To You
If someone's been emotionally abused in the past, they may not feel completely comfortable expressing themselves, they may not feel safe enough to speak up for themselves or be authentic because they fear criticism, condemnation, judgment, or rejection. "This is the overarching effect of emotional abuse and also contributes to the other signs and consequences. Once again, being patient with your partner will help build trust so they eventually feel comfortable opening up.
They Question Your Kind Gestures And Compliments
"When a person is emotionally abused [they] will often form a twisted definition of love. The lines between loving actions and abuse become blurred and it confuses them. For instance, they may think that sweet gestures you do for them always come with conditions because their ex used those gestures to manipulate them in the past.
They've Told You They're Not Good Enough
Your partner may say this seriously or even in a joking way, but regardless, pay attention. If they ever mention being "unworthy" of you or "not good enough," they may have been emotionally abused in the past. You only get what you subconsciously believe you deserve and no more." When someone doesn't truly believe they deserve a loving relationship with someone great, that may have been the message they got from a previous relationship.
They Overreact To The Small Things
"If your partner has 'abnormal' reactions to normal situations, they may be reacting to a past trauma-like abuse. You could be talking about the weather, trying a new restaurant, or getting busy in the bedroom. If something randomly triggers a strong reaction in your partner, they may have been emotionally abused by an ex. "If you care about the relationship, use this event to ask questions, and listen to the answers without judgement,"